Basic human emotions do not change and remain the same. Why do we say that? As human being we all face the same emotions. However some emotions may overpower others as per situations. According to personality types there are few emotions which act as the basic ones for us. It starts with how we process a situation into a message (i.e. perception) which makes us feel in a particular way.
Human behavior flows through 3 main sources – Knowledge, Desire and Emotions. – Plato
We have the ability to change our personality and emotions over a long period of time by changing our perception. But still as a habit of years of our life, there are some emotions which drag us to the same way we generally feel.
Toddler to young
When we are young we learn from observing our surroundings. The maximum source of our learning comes from our parents , then the people we meet and whatever we see. At this stage we just want love, pampering and food. We need time and attention from everyone but we have not started interpreting things. We are just living the way which makes us feel good. However a child also develops liking and disliking for something which is unique and different from his parents or siblings. The basic nature comprising of basic emotions of a person can be observed from their childhood.
When we enter into our “teens”, we don’t realize but puberty is overpowering us. Emotions like acceptability, freedom, identity, having relationships starts occupying our mind. That is the phase when we all go through almost all types of emotions like jealousy, hatred, anger, love, dependability, sorrow. We learn and move on. This is a very delicate time when we are actually creating our basic emotional type. The years from the age 13 to 19 are very important to have correct emotional guidance which generally leads us throughout life.
Today we are whatever we have lived in the past.
When we come in our 20s we are in the middle of making decisions related to our career and future lifestyle. We are not spoon fed by anymore like in school. We are adults in process of completing our graduation. At the same we also take the baggage of what we felt as teenagers and keep on defining life.
When we come at the age of 30 years, we had spent 7 – 9 years working. We run in our life to earn money and emotions slowly take a back seat. We start distancing ourselves from any emotional ties at work which is good as this is said to be professional. But at the same time some part of us is also reacting the same at our home. We think that as we have faced criticism, loneliness, hatred, anger, broken relationships earlier in our life and we will not face them again. Or we can very well control our emotions. But we are wrong. Our needs make us do the same mistakes again. We react similarly.
Example – When we enter into a relationship with someone in school or college, we are not in love with the person but the person’s traits. Those traits satisfy us in a particular way. We feel good when we are with them. We want to be attached in order to feel that satisfaction again and again. After breaking up multiple times, without realizing we are actually looking out for the same traits but in someone else.
Therefore we say that the basic human emotion or nature remains the same. One or two emotional states is more dominant than other emotional states.
In the next article we will discuss, what are the emotions in us or others that we should be alert from? How to manage them correctly.